Suggest US stocks descriptions

(Alex Sherwood) #1

We’ve just revealed the first 120 stocks that we’ll be offering when we launch US stocks, you can see them here.

Now we just need to come up with descriptions for them :sweat_smile: & I know that everyone here will have some creative ideas :wink:

As a reminder, here’s how we write our descriptions:

please suggest yours in this thread & we’ll pick a few to use when US stocks launch. We’re hoping you’ll come up with more like these :popcorn:

US stock descriptions are here!
BT is categorised as ‘Slow internet’ - Suggest changing it
BT is categorised as ‘Slow internet’ - Suggest changing it
(Emma) #2

Netflix - and chill (with a film)
Facebook - data capture service
Coca Cola - type 2 diabetes in a can
Exxon mobile - creators of oily seals
Ford Motor - No longer just in black
Manchester United - inferior football
Wal Mart - guns and groceries

There will be more :joy:

(Emma) #3

Starbucks - Pumpkin Spice Latte
Pepsi Co - Not Coke
Tesla - Cars you’ll never own
World Wrestling - Totally real entertainment
Nike - Young offender formal wear
McDonalds - Childhood obesity. With a toy.
Goldman Sachs - Vampire squid
Pfizer - Little blue pills :wink:
Riot Blockchain - Even they don’t know
General Electric - Non-specific electricity
General Motors - Non-specific vehicles
Walt Disney -Gender stereotyping since 1923

(Ben #88) #4

Adobe - Photo correction
Snap - Filters galore
Under Armour - Not actually bulletproof

(Vladislav Kozub) #6

Alibaba Group ADR - Chinese Amazon (and more)
Apple Inc - iPhone
Berkshire Hathaway - Stock that is effectively an ETF
Cisco Systems Inc - Office phones
Disney - Child’s dream
NVDA - Loved by gamers and miners

(Viktor) #7

I love this one.

(Chris) #8

If only Walmart owned Interflora. Guns n Roses would have been perfect.

(Ben #88) #9

Do Walmart sell guns? (Serious question.)

(Chris) #10


(Emma) #11

Yes but I think they’ve stopped doing assault rifles now

(Vladislav Kozub) #12

Yeah, their grocery stores used to look like this:



Love the suggestions so far but it’ll get watered down given the litatgation culture across the pond :pensive:

I like this. I take this

to mean

(Emma) #14

When you’re out and ask for Coke and they say “is Pepsi ok?” No, ITS NOT COKE.

End rant :grin:

Also if that’s the only one you’ve picked up as potentially problematic, I’ve played it too safe


You misunderstood me, they are all problematic* I was just playing… :slight_smile:

*I like this word, need to find more uses for it


Ford - Better Horses
Apple - Expensive Fruit
Alibaba - Without “The Forty Thieves”

(Chris) #17

Facebook - Data Mining
Coca Cola - Creators of Santa Claus
Manchester United - Ironically named football team


I enjoy funny descriptions, but Apple as “expensive fruit” is actively confusing and ambiguous. Maybe this is a company that actually sells apples?

How about:
“Rounded rectangles”

Or just:
“Expensive computers”

(R) #19

If someone buys Apple stock, thinking it was a fruit retailer based on the short description…they’re probably not cut out for this.


Quoting Freetrade:

So when we write the content for our stock descriptions, we have two priorities:

  1. Give our users clear, accurate information
  2. Assuming we’ve achieved number one, have some fun

The issue isn’t that someone might buy the stock thinking it was the something else, but that when you view the list, you might double-take and be forced to check what the stock is for.

People shouldn’t have to double-check these things to be sure they understood the joke right.

They should know what it is, and then enjoy the joke.

Actively lying in the short description is not “clear, accurate information”.

(Chris) #21

The logos help don’t they? I refuse to believe anyone will think it’s a high end greengrocer.
I’ll buy 10 BT shares of anyone shows otherwise.